Memoirs of an Ice-Cream Lady (Part 37)
By Emily Ho
Editor’s Note: The author runs an ice-cream parlor on Hong Kong’s Lamma Island. When time allows, she draws caricatures and writes. The following are semi-autobiographical anecdotes blending fact and fiction.
Asia as a Man’s Paradise
“I’m going to be an old maid!” cried Emily’s Western friend, a woman in her mid-30s who had moved to Hong Kong a few years ago.
She continued to complain: “Take a close look. All the Western men here are with Chinese, Filipina or Thai ladies. There’s no market for a Western woman like me.”
Enviously, she watched the Asian ladies with Western men pass her seat at a Lamma sandwich shop’s outdoor tables. Most of the ladies looked younger than her. Some of the men appeared old enough to be their fathers.
“Really, few Chinese girls marry Western men,” Emily replied, sighing. “Local girls may fancy Western guys, but marrying them is another issue. And these days so many local men have girlfriends or mistresses from the Chinese mainland.”
Emily knew the gap in Hong Kong’s population ratio had widened, reaching 100 women to every 88 men. “Local Chinese ladies have no market either. These days, it’d be like winning a lottery to marry a local guy,” she said.
“No wonder Hong Kong has so many Chinese lesbians!” Emily’s friend spoke without realizing that a lesbian couple sat next to them.
“Sh…” Too late, Emily tried to caution her friend.
Love and the Village
“Emily, this is my girlfriend Ah-Miu.”
A regular customer, a Western man in his 40s living on Lamma, introduced his Asian companion when buying ice cream in Emily’s shop.
“Nei-hau (hello), Ah-Mui. Where are you from?” Emily asked in Cantonese. She noticed that in features and figure, the lady looked like a Southerner.
“I’m from Shenzhen,” she replied, sounding (like most Southerners) friendly but a little shy with strangers.
A week later, the same man again visited Emily’s shop, this time with another lady. “This is Miss Chen from Shanghai. She’s my girlfriend,” he said in perfect Putonghua and without embarrassment.
“Ni-hao ma (how are you), Miss Chen?” Emily asked in her awkward Putonghua.
“Hen-hao (very good), Emily,” came the reply. “Lamma’s such a lovely place. I know the seafood’s really good, isn’t it?” She sounded eloquent and sociable, like many Shanghai women.
Within a fortnight, neither Ah-Miu, nor Miss Chen, joined their “mutual” boyfriend on Lamma, but were replaced by a Filipina.
“Hello, Emily. Robert always mentions you to me,” she said.
“Oh, really? Robert likes ice cream a lot. He comes here often.” Emily almost leaked the secret.
A month later, Robert visited Emily’s shop with one more Chinese lady. Before he could introduce “another” girlfriend, Emily spoke: “Nei-ho, Ah-Mui. Welcome to Lamma again!”
The lady’s face stiffened. She glared at Robert.
“Emily, this is Miss Li from Guangzhou.” Now Robert looked very embarrassed. “Please sell us two chocolate ice creams.”
“Oh, I’m so sorry, Miss Li. It’s my mistake.” Hastily, Emily turned away and scooped the ice cream. A cheeky smile filled her face.
As the customers left Emily’s shop, she heard “the latest lady” demand, “Who is that Ah-Mui?”
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