Fiction

Memoirs of an Ice-Cream Lady (Part 34)

By Emily Ho

Editor’s Note: The author runs an ice-cream parlor on Hong Kong’s Lamma Island. When time allows, she draws caricatures and writes. The following are semi-autobiographical anecdotes blending fact and fiction.


Chicken’s Skin and Crane’s Hair 
 
“You’re very beautiful!” Someone comments on Emily’s appearance. Most girls would feel flattered by such a remark, even if it was just a lie to lure them, but not Emily. 

She replies: “I’ve heard that compliment so many times! Please save it for less-charming women. I am sure it’ll make them happy.” Only joking, she giggles.

Emily never considers herself really beautiful. Actually, she regards the compliment as ironic because as a child she used to be teased for looking ugly.

“Thanks, but millions of girls out there look much better than I do.” Often Emily replies with this model answer too. She’s not just trying to be humble because she saw beautiful ladies from all over the world when previously working in a hotel.

Of course, beauty isn’t merely in the eyes of the beholder. In fact, it’s a matter of relativity and proportion. An infamous local playboy once described beauty as all about being average: not too tall or short, not too fat or skinny, not too large or small (obviously about certain body parts).
 
“So what will you do when the skin on my chin is like a chicken’s and my hair is grey like the feathers on a crane’s head?” Emily once asked a boyfriend this, quoting from a Chinese description of old age in response to his praise. 

As far as Emily knows, love probably doesn’t last long enough to witness such natural and phenomenal changes. But is enduring love really impossible? For Emily, true love means having someone to hold your hands and kiss your forehead (nurses excluded) when you live in a home for the elderly.


Emily’s a Heart-Breaker

One day a local Chinese lady popped into the shop and asked, “Emily, how do I look?” She gazed amicably at her own reflection in the shop’s tall mirror.

Looking at her, Emily noticed a nice dress and a sharply made-up face. “You look wonderful, darling,” Emily replied.

“Thanks.” The lady tidied her already-tidy hair.

Obviously satisfied with Emily’s answer, she left the shop.

Another time, the same lady came and asked the same question while wearing a different dress and different make-up.

“You look very pretty,” Emily said.

“Thank you. I’m going out to dinner with my new boyfriend. You know, not the same guy I mentioned last time.”

“Then have a good time,” Emily replied diplomatically. She knew that next time probably it would be yet another guy.

Several weeks passed, and the lady came repeatedly to ask the same question about her appearance. Repetition began to bore Emily.

The next time Emily was reading a book in the shop when the lady appeared, interrupted the reading and asked the same old thing.

Putting down her book, Emily said, “You look perfect. I have nothing to criticize. But my advice for you is to maybe spend more time reading or studying to improve your inner self.”

“Instead of wasting time on your appearance for these fruitless affairs,” Emily thought, but she withheld that comment in case her lady-friend might break down and cry.

But Emily didn’t regret telling the truth -- that good looks give no guarantee of a lasting relationship. She believes it takes courage to pinpoint a friend’s weaknesses.


Coming Soon:

Friends Vanish as Rivals Arrive (more Memoirs of an Ice-Cream Lady)

ARCHIVES